Virginia Is For Families

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Good morning Everybody. Let’s just pretend we are sitting around this giant mahogany table in a huge office with glass windows overlooking your favorite city. We are The Board. No we are not bored and in need of a grandiose fantasy. We are here on the top floor of this cool skyscraper because the world needs us to make some important decisions.

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Good Morning Ladies and Gentlemen!

As you know we have been put in charge of the internet. And we are going to make plans for the future of it. We have been told that it is very important to save energy in our future world. And by hooking up homes to broadband we can do more at home and save energy .

The car can stay in the driveway. And we can take naps whenever it is convenient. Questions?

“Ah, yes sir. The part about the naps sir. How is that any different from what many people do now?”

Good question, Mr. Hobstar. We are all aware that there is a lot of napping going on. Probably in this very building right now at least 20 percent of all employees are blowing zzzzz’s in the direction of their computers. But they are on their breaks, right? Work when you are supposed to work. Sleep when you are supposed to sleep. And make love all of the time!

(A general disturbance breaks out)

“Sir, please. When they put you and the rest of us in charge of the internet I’m not sure they wanted us discussing things like lovemaking . This is serious business!”

What are you saying Hobstar? Are you saying that I am not a serious person? Have you looked into your soul recently and decided you have the courage to journey into the Heart of Darkness and meet Mr Kurtz? Because Mr. Kurtz didn’t sleep very well last night and he’s not really ready for visitors this morning.

“No sir. I mean of course not sir. I just mean that we should perhaps discuss things that we wouldn’t mind seeing on the front pages of the Washington Post or the NY Times.”

Exactly my point Hobstar! We want to say something that will make people look and listen. Do you think anyone will want to publish this stuff if it’s highly technical in nature. Of course not! How do you think we have gotten this far? Crossword puzzles? Wake up Hobstar and smell the suntan lotion!

What do you think we are all going to be doing once we don’t have to come to work? And don’t tell me Hobstar. Just think it. You have already had more than your fair share of airtime.

Someday this building is going to be a museum! People will pay just to ride up here and look out the window. They may even have a bunch of dummies sitting around the table discussing the future. You could apply for your old job Hobstar! HaHaHa.

(The room is silent as everyone except Hobstar contemplates being replaced by a dummy)

Alright then. I suggest we all take a break and go someone for lunch. None of the restaurants have closed yet.

Somebody call the guy upstairs and get my helicopter ready!

http://g2bgreen.com/can-broadband-help-clean-up-the-environment

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